


Children Of The Same War [ITALIAN PLAYLIST / A FOUND FANFICTION]

by SophiaMcD



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Angst, At least listen to Amen, I'm begging you, It's not that weird just go with it, Italian-English, M/M, Mine this for fic titles or prompts, Nicky's Implied Redemption Arc, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Shut up I learned Italian this way, Translation, and Ti Vengo A Cercare, as told in translated Italian songs, because oof
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:29:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 2,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26881456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SophiaMcD/pseuds/SophiaMcD
Summary: "Waking up today, I thought that it was youWho told me, “Idiot,You have to come back to life.”Look. I have always been the kind of person who would listen to a song and quietly hallucinate a fanvid to whatever I was currently hyperfixating on. And one day, after many years of trying and failing to crush this tendency I decided to lean into it and see if I could learn Italian by listening to all the Italian pop music I could get my hands onand pretending it was about Star Trek.Anyway it worked.So now, people can't say things like "huh, since I lost my head for Nicky/Joe I've been exploring Italian music" where I can see it andnot expect stuff to happen. Because Amen by Noemi isclearlyabout Crusades-era Nicky, and "Tra il Male e Dio" is the most ludicrously Starcrossed Historical Gay song in any language, prove me wrong.So, I've made Old Guard playlists before, but this playlist tells a story? Sort of?
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Comments: 7
Kudos: 3





	1. ALL MY MISTAKES

The whole playlist on Spotify:  
  


  
ALL MY MISTAKES  
(Tutti i Miei Sbagli, by Subsonica)

_You…_  
You can defend me and hurt me,  
kill me and start again  
and take me alive.  
You’re all my mistakes.  
  
In free-fall,  
in search of a crash  
But as long as you’re here  
I can say that I’m alive.  
  
_You_ … drowning to breathe  
Also learning to bleed  
In the elusive day  
You’re real time  
The one to defend me and hurt me  
Slicing up the night and the heart  
To feel alive  
In all my mistakes  
  
I don’t care much if  
Nothing’s the same as before  
The words about us  
Dissolve this way.  
  
_You_ … drowning to breathe  
Also learning to bleed   
In the elusive day  
You’re real time  
The one to defend me and hurt me  
Slicing up the night and the heart  
To feel alive  
In all my mistakes.  
  
_You…  
_My pride which can wait  
And even if there’s more pain  
I find no regret  
I can’t surrender  
To all my mistakes

You’re all my mistakes  
You’re all my mistakes  
You’re all my mistakes


	2. CHANGE MY DESTINY

  
  
CHANGE MY DESTINY  
( _Cambiami il Destino_ , by Ania Cecilia)  
  


Change my destiny  
Wash my face  
I’m happy  
If you give me a smile  
  
Have they killed me yet  
Or just wounded me?  
I can't hear.  
What was the point?  
In this moment  
I’m a silence,  
Free.  
  
What do you think?  
What brings joy to your mind?  
Ordinary man-turned-judge,  
You gave them everything they wanted  
Now you can put an end to the show  
  
Because I’m alive  
As long as I’m breathing  
I ask it of you:  
Change my destiny  
I can fly if there’s wind  
Let me try.  
  
What do you think?  
What brings joy to your mind?  
Ordinary man-turned-judge  
You gave them everything they wanted  
Now you can put an end to the show  
  
I’m going back to being free  
I’ll tell you while I burn out.  
  
What do you think?  
What brings joy to your mind?  
Ordinary man-turned-judge  
You gave them everything they wanted  
Now you can put an end to the show

…an end to the show.


	3. AMEN

AMEN

( _Amen_ by Noemi)

  
  
I put my soul on my shoulders  
Because it’s too tired to walk  
I’ve seen too many sharks coming to the surface  
Too many dreams go to shit  
I took my heart in hand  
Because it lost too much blood  
Searching in vain for the proof  
Of what you all call ‘love’

  
I set my soul at peace  
Because it’s been at war too long  
And after all this time  
It’s turned into cement  
I kicked my heart  
Because it had stopped beating  
And making love  
But now enough, now I say:

Amen  
On earth as it is in heaven  
Amen  
Even if I don’t believe  
Amen  
We’re the whole world  
Amen

I filled my eyes with mud  
Not to see the conquered along my path  
Conquered by pain or by anger  
Through destiny’s injustice  
And I’ve listened to my sentence  
Because life has struck me  
In the back too many times

I put on my best clothes  
For the luck I have of being alive  
Even if I don’t expect the world  
to thank me for that.  
And I say ‘I’m sorry’ to love  
If I haven’t recognised it  
I say ‘I’m sorry’ to the Lord

Amen  
On earth as it is in heaven  
Amen  
Now that I believe it  
Amen  
We’re the whole world  
Amen  
Amen

We’re all children of the same earth  
And we’re at war  
Amen  
Amen  
  
We’re children of the same war  
In heaven as it is on earth.

  
  



	4. IF I WERE THE JUDGE

  
  
IF I WERE THE JUDGE

( _Se fossi io il Giudice_ by Afterhours)

  
Waking up today I realised that  
Everything else is stupid  
I want to try to live  
And I want there to be light  
Or else darkness  
I walk like a man  
And talk like a man  
And in the midst of all this randomness  
What could you do?  
What could you have?  
Could you ever understand?  
It was never going to end.  
  
If I were the judge  
I’d kneel down  
And I’d give your name to every prayer  
That I’d recognise  
In the midst of all this randomness  
  
Who runs?  
Who’s made of stone?  
Who turns to God?  
Who spreads wings and flies away?  
  
Everyone has a way of embracing the world  
The way I have is suffering till the end.  
Free to not be myself any more  
Free to not please you any more  
Free to throw it all away  
  
Waking up today I realised that  
Everything else is stupid  
I want to try to live  
  
If I were the judge  
I’d kneel down  
I wouldn’t ask you questions  
I wouldn’t ask why.

  
I’ve stopped hiding,  
You’ll recognise me  
I walk like a man  
And talk like a man  
And I have no wings and I fly away.

Everyone has a way of embracing the world  
The way I have is suffering till the end.  
Free to not be myself any more  
Free to not please you any more  
Free to throw it all away

  
Waking up today I thought that it was you  
Who told me, “Idiot,  
You have to come back to life.”


	5. BETTER

BETTER

( _Meglio_ by Valerio Scanu)

  
  
Living repeated moments   
If everywhere I look I see you  
You’re the ground  
Now collapsing under me  
Asphalt sky that wants to rain  
I rip out of my mind every need  
That’s devouring me inside  
My past has a broken memory  
I’m looking for new ways of thinking  
Because nostalgia isn’t a vice of mine.  
  
Leave me  
Don’t cry  
Forget  
Love can kill a little, if loving is a habit  
And so  
Release me from these chains of yours  
Which remain invisible  
So if you hate me  
It’s better if you hate me  
  
Better, better ….  
  
Repeated, absent heartbeats  
If everywhere I listen I hear you  
Time passes  
It doesn’t console me at all  
It leaves tangles without a comb.  
Skin changes like the seasons  
But faithful to myself  
I’ll laugh at the jokes of the past  
With a new spirit  
And this melancholy will pass, you’ll see  
  
Leave me  
Don’t cry  
Forget  
Love can kill a little, if loving is a habit  
And so  
Release me from these chains of yours  
Which remain invisible  
So if you hate me  
If you hate me it’s …  
  
Now I don’t tremble  
I’m not afraid any more  
Of the empty spaces in the depths of my memory  
I’ll fill myself with dust and pain  
I reverse the motion and the angles of my heart  
  
Leave me  
Don’t cry  
Forget  
Love can kill a little, if loving is a habit  
And so  
Release me from these chains of yours  
Which remain invisible  
So if you hate me  
It’s better if you hate me  
  
Better, better ….  
Better, better ….  



	6. BETWEEN EVIL AND GOD

  
BETWEEN EVIL AND GOD

( _Tra il Male e Dio_ by Pierdavide Carone)

What do you know of heroes?  
With a script in their hands  
which I, lost in your eyes, don’t know.  
What does it mean if  
The mind goes  
The heart goes  
But lips imprison things?  
Release it, release your soul into the sunlight  
Free, free your sweet words and …  
  
Break me with kisses  
Take a heart in your hand  
And then without hesitating  
Give me words of love  
that you can’t explain, but  
Hold me, caress me  
Reject me, then take me again  
And leave me again to dream of having you  
Between evil and God.

What do you know,  
You, who are already leaving?  
No, stay here,  
Even if now I know  
That there’s nothing  
Between the sun and the moon  
We’re from different worlds, you and I  
But tonight I’m Saturn and you’re Jupiter, come and …  
  
Break me with kisses  
Take a heart in your hand  
And then without hesitating  
Give me words of love  
that you can’t explain, but  
Hold me, caress me  
Reject me, then take me again  
And leave me again to dream of having you  
Between evil and God.

  
There’s a long silence as you refasten your shirt  
You say that it’s a mistake, that you’re hurting me  
But I  
want to carry on.  
  
Break me with kisses  
Take a heart in your hand  
And then without hesitating  
Give me words of love  
that you can’t explain, but  
Hold me, caress me  
Reject me, then take me again  
And leave me again to dream of having you  
Between evil and God.  
Between evil and God…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm SATURN and you're JUPITER!!!
> 
> Is a song even allowed to be that gay?
> 
> Note: I have dutifully translated "riallacci" as "refasten", because, well, it does mean that. But it's a slightly weird way to talk about doing up a shirt - I'd expect "abbottonare" and I mean, if you were going to say " _relace_ your shirt", that's what you'd say.


	7. ON SUNDAY

ON SUNDAY

( _Di Domenica_ by Subsonica)

  
Do you know what's going on?  
It’s day now.  
It's Sunday.  
  
You won’t be afraid of me  
Nor of committing a sin

In the void  
of a sweet bed  
on a Sunday

They’re only changes  
If they scare us  
They’re feelings

Even if tomorrow  
I'll be a regret  
Maybe you can let yourself go  
On Sunday

They’re only changes  
If they scare us  
They’re feelings

All the vows,  
now that it’s Sunday  
are juvenile

Flip your destiny  
(I'll be always here, I'll be always here)  
Flip your pillow,  
on Sunday, on Sunday.

They’re only changes  
If they scare us  
They’re feelings

All the vows,  
now that it’s Sunday  
are juvenile


	8. THE ART OF STARTING OVER

THE ART OF STARTING OVER

( _L'arte di Ricominciare,_ by Paola Turci)

I’ll learn from a sunset  
How to say goodbye, I'll learn  
And from every man who waits  
I'll learn to return,  
From silence I'll learn your song  
And from a trembling leaf  
How to let go  
From my skin, from the cuts  
I'll learn, I'll learn.

A void in the chest  
The moment when you're about to collapse  
I'll learn how to start over

And if love is an act of courage  
In your arms the world starts over  
It's a natural revolution  
The art of starting over  
The art of starting over

I'll learn from history  
And from every story, I'll learn  
I'll learn that in the end  
There's no ending  
And from the passing of time  
I’ll learn to forgive  
I'll learn that it hurts  
Now I know  
Now I know

A flower that breaks the ground  
Do you hear the sound?  
It's the art of starting over

And if love is an act of courage  
In your arms the world starts over  
It's a natural revolution  
The art of starting over  
The art of starting over

I'll learn what is useful  
And what I should leave here

And if love is an act of courage  
In your arms the world starts over  
It's a natural revolution  
The art of starting over  
The art of starting over


	9. THE WORLD BEFORE YOU

THE WORLD BEFORE YOU

( _Il Mondo Prima di Te_ by Annalisa)

One day we’ll understand who we are  
Without saying anything,  
And it’ll seem normal to imagine  
That the world spins  
Around another sun.

It’s a home without walls  
To build over time  
To build from nothing  
Like a flower  
Down to the roots --  
It’s my gift to you  
To water and nurture.  
  
And we’re mountains overlooking the see  
From the highest point we’ll learn to fly  
Then we’ll come back down  
Along dangerous slopes  
Defenceless  
We’ll come back down  
To light each other up like the summer  
That shines now  
What was the world like before you?  
  
One day we’ll understand who we are  
Without saying anything,  
Anything special  
And then we’ll undress each other  
So we can fly closer to the sun  
In a home without walls  
To build over time  
To build from nothing  
We’re flowers  
We’re two roots  
That divide to start growing again  
  
And we’re mountains overlooking the sea  
From the highest point we’ll learn to fly  
Then we’ll come back down  
Along dangerous slopes  
Defenceless  
We’ll come back down  
To light each other up like summer  
That shines now  
What was the world like before you?  
  
Now and forever I ask you to come in  
To the last feast, and into my first love  
Then we’ll come back down  
Along dangerous slopes  
Defenceless  
We’ll come back down  
To light each other up like the summer  
That shines now  
  
What was the world like before you?  
What was the world like before you?  
What was the world like before you?  
  



	10. FORGIVING

FORGIVING

( _Perdonare_ by Nek)

It’s difficult, loving each other  
Never putting each other in chains  
The sum of all the mistakes  
Has made us better all the same  
In the midst of the mess of the world  
In your eyes you have the deep meaning of this life.  
Difficult for every man  
Not to stay a child forever  
You accept me for what I am  
You hear me for what I play  
And now that day by day  
I put my instincts, and effort into it  
All that matters is having you beside me,   
and being worthy of it.

In the midst of the storm we’re still here  
Holding each other tighter to not lose each other  
You’ll see that it’ll change, it’ll change,   
And if it changes  
It’s worth forgiving, forgiving  
(It’s never easy.)  
Let’s get up from the ground, let’s start again from here  
If two destinies still say “Yes.”  
I know that it’ll change, it’ll change  
And if it changes,  
I can forgive you, forgive you

It’s difficult, growing together  
Mixing poison with honey  
The sum of our flaws together  
Makes us perfect

And now that day by day  
You put your instincts, and effort into it  
Without rules, all that matters is having you at the centre,   
and being worthy of it

In the midst of the storm we’re still here  
Holding each other tighter to not lose each other  
You’ll see that it’ll change, it’ll change,   
And if it changes  
It’s worth forgiving, forgiving  
(It’s never easy.)  
Let’s get up from the ground, let’s start again from here  
If two destinies still say “Yes.”  
I know that it’ll change, it’ll change  
And if it changes,  
You can forgive me, forgive me

So this heart is grateful for you  
And it won’t take you for granted  
It’s everything I believe in  
You’re in everything I see  
And now that we’ve understood  
And we have infinite space   
Let’s drink to our past  
And throw behind us what it has been.

You’ll see that it’ll change, it’ll change,  
And if it changes  
It’s worth forgiving, forgiving  
(It’s never easy.)  
Let’s get up from the ground, let’s start again from here  
If two destinies still say “Yes.”  
I know that it’ll change, it’ll change  
And if it changes,  
Loving is forgiving, forgiving. 


	11. AND I COME SEEKING YOU

AND I COME SEEKING YOU

( _E ti Vengo a Cercare_ by Franco Battiato)

  
  
And I come seeking you  
Even just to see you, or to talk  
Because I need your presence  
to better understand my essence.

This popular feeling  
is born from divine mechanisms  
A mystic and sensual kidnapping  
imprisons me to you.

I should change the focus of my desires  
Not settle for little everyday joys  
Be like a hermit  
Who gives up everything

And I come seeking you,  
With the excuse that I have to speak to you  
Because I like what you think, what you say  
Because I see my roots in you.

This century, now at its end  
Saturated with parasites without dignity  
Pushes me only to be better  
With more determination

To emancipate myself from the nightmare of the passions  
To seek the One above Good and Evil,  
To be a divine image of this reality.

And I come seeking you  
Because I feel good with you  
Because I need your presence.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1099 is very near the end of the century and it _does_ push him to be better. So.

**Author's Note:**

> Note: My Italian is good but it's not perfect. I welcome corrections throughout.


End file.
